Godly Relationships

Godly Relationships

November 10, 2015

Tonight Deacon Lance gives the members of Just for Christ, a powerful word of from the Lord. Deacon Lance’s specialty in relationships and young people has given the members wisdom about how to handle saved and unsaved relationships with people. Deacon Lance takes us to the key principle, any relationship with people, must be second to your relationship with God.

1.     Relationship with God.

a.     Relationship with God is the prime focus of our lives. It is our relationship to God thriving or dying that influences our interactions with everyone else. God is the reason we live we live because of Christ’s sacrifice on the cross without Christ we are nothing. Your relationship to God should have three characteristics:

·      (Personal)à1 Peter 5:6-7: Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, 7 casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. This verse emphasizes God’s personal concern for our wellbeing. God is the only God at the same time He overflows with love for us. Our relationship to God needs to be established on His love for us. He cares about the aspects of our lives, we cannot have a relationship with God for others, we must build and construct our own relationship with God.

·      (Intimate)àRomans 5:8: But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. God was intentional about His love toward us. He commanded, he directed, he put forth His loved toward us. When we were sinners, we did not understand we needed God’s love and yet God overlooked our sinful condition to sacrifice His for us. Real love is action, and God acted upon His love. He did not leave us but He saved us. This is intimacy, a deep life changing love of holy proportions.

·      (Consistent)àHebrews 13:8: Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. God is consistent in His love toward us. His love is unwavering, never changing, and like our God we should be building our commitment to Him. God is going to meet us where we are.

2.     Relationships with friends and family.

a.     Family and friends’ relations should be influenced by our relationship with God. They should see God working in us and changing us.

           

·      (Exemplify)à Ephesians 5:1: Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. To be an example of Christ, be an example of our relationship with God. The act of forgiveness is ongoing we work to forgive, God has the power to forgive and it is over. As imitators of God we need to imitate His character. Exemplify, meet the standard of God’s requirements in His written Word people cannot see Jesus if our sin and old habits are blocking His work.

·      (Forgiving)à1 John 1:9: If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Forgiveness is difficult especially when the trauma runs deep. However, if God has a forgiving heart, and His Spirit dwells in us then we have the same power to forgive those who have done evil against us. This world thrives on bitterness and cold hearts turning to stone, how much more can we show Christ when people see how we forgive those who don’t deserve mercy. Because we did not deserve mercy from God and yet He still loved us and forgave us. Let us be quick to forgive others and remember it is an ongoing process, a conscious effort to forgive someone.

·      (Reconciled)à2 Cor 5:18-21: Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, 19 that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation. 20 Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God. 21 For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. Broken families, broken friendships are all around us. Godly relationships are born when reconciliation occurs, reconciliation is bridging or reestablishing a connection that was lost or severed. A working relationship with God will soon evolve to a working and recovering relationship with others. It is unlikely God wants to live and dwell with friends and family who are broken and damaged. Let God use you as an ambassador of His unconditional, love, mercy and grace.

3.     Relationship with others

There is a difference between being a friend and being friendly. We must be careful not to call everyone a friend.  2 Corinthians 6:14àDo not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? We cannot be unequally yoked. We cannot be friends with people who have different desires than us. Stay clear of unequally yoked friendships because we can start being influenced by the wrong forces. Sometimes we are put in people’s lives as only being an example unto a person and not a friend.

James 4:4àAdulterers and[a] adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.

·      How are we being influenced? Our relationship with God, would we rather put into our relationship with the world versus the Creator of our souls?

·      As a Christian you have a responsibility to your transformation and for others to seeing or witnessing your transformation. It is not Christian behavior to hide yourself and align yourself with the Word of God. People will see how your walk was different to theirs, people will witness how your walk is different from their lifestyle.

·      “We don’t always choose God, sometimes we choose the worst.” John 15:5à “No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you.” We should look at our friendships with the same kind of intimacy and connection. Time and experience builds friendship, it is putting in hard work, and it is being around people who are like minded and of the same spirit. We need to examine our friends through our unconditional love lens that come from God.

o   Sometimes we have to be taught to be a friend to someone. We must have perquisites to our friends when we need to recognize not everyone is perfect.

o   You can only be who you are as a friend. Let us look at how God looks at us and at how God sees us covered and perfected in the love of God. So if Jesus called us friend, then we know we are a friend. In order to be a friend we must go to God to be a friend. We can’t afraid to be checked by our friend.

Hints and Tips for Possible Spouses Always remain God Centered

2 Timothy 2:22: Make a conscious decision to flee our lusts, you made a conscious decision to follow your fleshly impulses and lust. You need to be intentional about putting your lust to death. Make a conscious decision to flee. Leave your youthful lust. God has given us a desire for passion and intimacy, youthful lust is immature and not birthed yet. It is premature. Flee from those premature infatuations. But follow righteousness, flee means take the escape, flee when it is early, do not give Satan or sin a foothold.

If you are dating or seeking a courtship, remember having God centered relationships with prospects and others, conscious decisions, can be stable if these relationships are a commitment to make it God centered.

o   2 Cor 6:14-15à Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?

o   If your prospect is unsaved or not living the life they profess then don’t be afraid to call it what it is: a red flag.

o   Set your expectations before hand. Keep in mind you have to find and learn about your spouse. What are their dreams, their ambitions? What are their likes, their pet peeves, what troubles did they have to overcome?

o   Keep in mind, you should be growing and striving to take the steps to become husband or wife ready. Know where you are, make conscious decisions. Know where this person stands.

1 Thessalonians 4:3-5àFor this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, 5 not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God;

o   Singlehood is not a wilderness it is a delight. Learn to be by yourself, learn to discipline yourself accordingly before you accept the union of marriage. Many marriages unravel because the spouses before have not mastered themselves, their own lustful desires and passions before they married.

Proverbs 4:23à Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Guard your heart. We have to protect our hearts. We have to watch what we let in, because what is inside of us will soon control us. Guard our hearts is around the clock task, it is the vigilance to stay away from people or things who are poisonous and it is our responsibility to invest in positive relationships. Guarding your heart also means to not trust anyone to soon wait until the Holy Spirit tells you it is okay to invest or build a relationship with someone.

Tonight was an ah-mazing message from Deacon Lance! So many questions were answered and the biggest need we all have will always be filled. None of us will be alone, God’s love fills our insatiable appetite and He is always ready to provide a solid foundation, for you, single or not.

How do you feel about having relationships or friendships with unsaved friends? What is your perspective about the single life?

Comment below!